‘Oh no! The scary Graveyard of Dooom!’ Angel Cakes piped in from the back seat as we drove past the tiny cemetery in town. In case you are wondering like I was, it is the ‘Graveyard of Dooom’ because they might come back as ghosts. Yes, it can happen at any cemetery, not just ours.
This prompted a whole discussion about people dying and how they are buried. I’m sure it is because she heard me tell Daycare Lady that I am going to the wake today and funeral on Friday. It was just so sweet when she asked if she could go to the funeral with me because I was going to be sad and she wanted to be there to give me hugs to make me feel better. It took all my will power not to pull the car over and snuggle her close.
Buckaroo asked if he got to say goodbye to Great Grandpa when he died. Of course he didn’t because I was pregnant with him at the time. He got the saddest look on his face. Great Grandpa was hurting because he is dead, and that makes him sad is what he told me
Lesson learned? Don’t talk about death and funerals in the car. You can’t reach over and hug your kids until they scream they can’t breathe if you do.
Showing posts with label Angel Cakes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Angel Cakes. Show all posts
April 22, 2010
December 3, 2009
Entranced
It just occurred to me that I haven't posted in over a week. I have been working on a couple of posts, but neither of them is finished yet.
The idea finallysmacked me up side the head came to me that if I write my posts in email I don't have to worry about them going into Draft folder purgatory. And did you know that they made it so you can post from an email!? All these new fangled things, I swear. Yes, I are smart. S-M-R-T.
Anyway, my family is in town so I have been spending all my time with them since we are rarely in the same state anymore. My mom got to town a few days before the new arrival, and will be here until the New Year, but miracles do happen and my brother, his wife, and son were also in town!
I am not a big fan of my sister-in-law. The most recent reason because they almost didn't come into town. She wasn't going to take time off work, but wouldn't let my brother make the six hour drive alone with his son. My brother may not win a father of the year award, but he loves his son more then anything. And since he is a stay at home dad, I think he is capable of making the drive without her. In the end, they did come into town and that is what really matters. My kids got to spend time with their cousin, and I got to see my brother.
I tried to make sure I was giving my nephew the attention he deserved since I only get to see him once or twice a year, but it was hard. Fighting for my attention was this sweet little bit of nothin.
I just want to nibble on his little hands.
He is the last baby of my family, so leaving that aside, and that he is my sister's child, and that I stood by her hospital bed for over three hours in three inch heels trying to bring him into the world, he is just sweetest bit of nothing I have seen since my children were born.
His mommy finally took him away from me since I wasn’t going to give him up. So I traded one sleepy boy for another. My Buckaroo fell asleep almost immediately following him climbing into my lap.
Looking at that picture, I can’t help but see glimpses of the boy and man he will become. Prior to being around my nephews, Buckaroo seemed little. Not little in the sense of height, because he is only and inch shorter then my daughter who is two years older, but little in the sense of young. Seeing him with his cousins, I was just struck by how much bigger he is both physically and emotionally.
I am a little sad to let go of the illusion of him being my baby/big boy and having to start seeing him as just a big boy. I don’t want another baby, or to keep him from growing up, it is just hard letting go of that time in our lives. I know I still have years before he will stop climbing in my lap to snuggle, years before I won’t be his comfort on the same level that his blanky is. And even after those years, I believe he will still run to greet me when I arrive home, and give me impromptu kisses and tell me he loves me; but he is grown up. He is turning into a big boy/little man.
I guess I didn’t pay as close attention to the loss of those years with my daughter because Buckaroo was born and suddenly my attention was split between the two. I had a more gradual realization with Angel Cakes. Watching her grow into herself and the person she will become has been easier because she always seemed older then her age. This is the Sassy Pants who at two told me that we needed to fix the lock on the cabinet because it was ‘dangerous’; it had ’chemicals’ in it. She said these words so effortlessly. When I look back at the pictures from when I brought Buckaroo home from the hospital, I can see what a baby she still was, but she just seemed so much older, more mature then her years.
I spent the time enjoying her and learning how to be a mom in each new phase of her life. With my son, I am more experienced and know that this is the end of those years. As much as I look forward to seeing the amazing children they will become when they enter school and later how they handle the challenges of every day life as an adult, I can’t help mourning for the passing of the baby years.
The idea finally
Anyway, my family is in town so I have been spending all my time with them since we are rarely in the same state anymore. My mom got to town a few days before the new arrival, and will be here until the New Year, but miracles do happen and my brother, his wife, and son were also in town!
I am not a big fan of my sister-in-law. The most recent reason because they almost didn't come into town. She wasn't going to take time off work, but wouldn't let my brother make the six hour drive alone with his son. My brother may not win a father of the year award, but he loves his son more then anything. And since he is a stay at home dad, I think he is capable of making the drive without her. In the end, they did come into town and that is what really matters. My kids got to spend time with their cousin, and I got to see my brother.
I tried to make sure I was giving my nephew the attention he deserved since I only get to see him once or twice a year, but it was hard. Fighting for my attention was this sweet little bit of nothin.
Brandon At One Week Old
I just want to nibble on his little hands.
Tell me you could resist!
He is the last baby of my family, so leaving that aside, and that he is my sister's child, and that I stood by her hospital bed for over three hours in three inch heels trying to bring him into the world, he is just sweetest bit of nothing I have seen since my children were born.
His mommy finally took him away from me since I wasn’t going to give him up. So I traded one sleepy boy for another. My Buckaroo fell asleep almost immediately following him climbing into my lap.
Sleeping Buckaroo
Looking at that picture, I can’t help but see glimpses of the boy and man he will become. Prior to being around my nephews, Buckaroo seemed little. Not little in the sense of height, because he is only and inch shorter then my daughter who is two years older, but little in the sense of young. Seeing him with his cousins, I was just struck by how much bigger he is both physically and emotionally.
I am a little sad to let go of the illusion of him being my baby/big boy and having to start seeing him as just a big boy. I don’t want another baby, or to keep him from growing up, it is just hard letting go of that time in our lives. I know I still have years before he will stop climbing in my lap to snuggle, years before I won’t be his comfort on the same level that his blanky is. And even after those years, I believe he will still run to greet me when I arrive home, and give me impromptu kisses and tell me he loves me; but he is grown up. He is turning into a big boy/little man.
I guess I didn’t pay as close attention to the loss of those years with my daughter because Buckaroo was born and suddenly my attention was split between the two. I had a more gradual realization with Angel Cakes. Watching her grow into herself and the person she will become has been easier because she always seemed older then her age. This is the Sassy Pants who at two told me that we needed to fix the lock on the cabinet because it was ‘dangerous’; it had ’chemicals’ in it. She said these words so effortlessly. When I look back at the pictures from when I brought Buckaroo home from the hospital, I can see what a baby she still was, but she just seemed so much older, more mature then her years.
I spent the time enjoying her and learning how to be a mom in each new phase of her life. With my son, I am more experienced and know that this is the end of those years. As much as I look forward to seeing the amazing children they will become when they enter school and later how they handle the challenges of every day life as an adult, I can’t help mourning for the passing of the baby years.
November 19, 2009
Happy Birthday Angel
Happy birthday sweetheart!
It has been five years since I waddled into the doctors office for our last check up. Even before you were born you refused to conform to anyones expectations. You put us on notice that any plans we made were subject to your approval. I will never forget the look on Daddy's face when the doctor said you were going to be born today instead of the following Monday as planned. It was a cross between excitement, wonder and fear. I just laid on the table freaking out for a minute. Excitement at finally seeing your beautiful face waged war against the overwhelming fear I felt. In typical Mommy fashion after my initial freak the hell out, I calmed down and waited to finally meet the wonderful baby girl who turned my world upside down and inside out.
It has been a year of many changes and you have grown so much.
I can't belive you turn five today.
It has been five years since I waddled into the doctors office for our last check up. Even before you were born you refused to conform to anyones expectations. You put us on notice that any plans we made were subject to your approval. I will never forget the look on Daddy's face when the doctor said you were going to be born today instead of the following Monday as planned. It was a cross between excitement, wonder and fear. I just laid on the table freaking out for a minute. Excitement at finally seeing your beautiful face waged war against the overwhelming fear I felt. In typical Mommy fashion after my initial freak the hell out, I calmed down and waited to finally meet the wonderful baby girl who turned my world upside down and inside out.
It has been a year of many changes and you have grown so much.
You are still my studious girl who can't wait to start school next year.
Who isn't afraid of bugs and loves anything outside.
Who does things her way! Who says you can't garden in a bathing suit?
My beautiful ballarina.
Who rides on two wheels.
You will never cease to amaze Daddy and I. We love you more then anything!
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